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Watch this 5 minute clip of my recent roast of a retiring Ernst & Young partner on a yacht in New York Harbor last summer: (click the image)



Beth Beans, Bob Brasch (retiring victim), Detective Peccadillo, Fred Beans
Fred Beans Automotive Empire


roast-(noun)--a good natured, affectionate ribbing of a friend, co-worker, boss or family member based on true information culled by a professional. (Do not try this at home). When successful and unforgettably memorable roasts are performed by Joey Perillo.
Not cheap!
(the roast that is).

Your victim before the roast......

Who:The retiring executive, your boss, your spouse, the blushing bride-to-be (she'll be blushing all right), the tough guy groom-to-be (you did what?), that rat bastid co-worker of yours.......hey, you know who oughta be roasted!

When: retirement party, award ceremony, significant anniversary, significant birthday, Parole, Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanza gift

Why: because they deserve it....and they will never forget it....and you will look like a genius......

How: You get in touch with me. We haggle over the fee. You relent but remain bitter. I get information from you including phone numbers and Email addresses of other people who have dirt on the victim. I somehow manage to write funny stuff from the dreck you give me. I interrupt the dinner or ceremony or gathering usually representing myself as a policeman or other authority figure. I single out the poor bast....the loved one. I roast the person using the info I culled.......victim is alternately ecstatic and mortified. The room erupts in raucous laughter many times. I finish in 30-50 minutes. Your friends want my card. You pay me. I pretend to be too professional to stay and eat with you. I stay.
You become less bitter with time.

Your victim.....after......


Recently cashed a huge check for a monstrously killer successful birthday roast of a big shot Tax Accounting Maven in Bucks County, PA even though I hardly had time to be so brilliant seeing as I also had to pull off TWO other hugely significant and hugely successful corporate roasts - one involved skewering a major muchety-muck at the famed Union League in Philadelphia, then on to bringing much mirth to the multidudinous masses at a tony pavilion on the sound outside of Greenwich, CT whilst I torched a fabulously successful furniture artisan......

MORE BLATHER: Still counting the money from two killer comic roasts I created and performed to much raucous acclaim  - the last one being in a private room at Wolfgang Puck's at the Borgata in Atlantic City for a PriceWaterhouseCoopers partner - the other for an equally Top a the Corporate Food Chain Executive of Pepsico (Pepsi) at the North Carolina Museum of Art in Raleigh, NC - did I mention I killed? References available!

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